I agree that the chauvanistic anthropromorphic representation of aliens is sort of a cop-out, created so that most of us could relate. And there could be other, more compelling reasons for that being accurate.

Any technologically proficient alien will need some basic abilities. First, mobility. It will need a way to get around to collect the various components of tools. The easiest way to imagine that is legs, although two is an arbitrary figure. In fact, humans started out with four.

Next, a way to collect and manipulate the material around them. Hands.

And third, a way to perceive the world around them. Someplace for eyes, which operate at a long distance, ears, a shorter distance, nose, even shorter, touch, at the surface, and taste, internal. A head is optional, but more efficient than moving the entire body to sense the world.

And a brain to process information. Having that close to the main sensory organs makes sense, and those need to be able to move around. A head.

It's difficult to imagine an arrangement which would allow all of those things which isn't similar to humans. Porpoises and dolphins and intelligent, yet haven't developed technology because of these limitations. Gorillas and chimps have, by contributing to the evolution of humans.

At least that's my take on it. It could be that a humanoid developed the technology and then evolved into another shape to use it. That's entirely possible.

Second, it will need a way to manipulate