After all, voters can't be bribed. There's no way to determine if they voted for you even if they accept your bribe.

However, you can bribe people into abandoning their principles. The Dole is OK if it comes from the GOP, especially if the recipient is in the GOP.

I'm going to accept this bribe, though, even though I'll be the first to admit I neither need it nor deserve it at this time. Still, it will come in handy next year when catastrophic inflation savages the American economy.

Come to think of it, maybe I should spend it right away, while it still retains some purchasing power. This time next year, $1200 may not be enough to buy you a pack of smokes, a gallon of gas, or a cup at Starbuck's.

Still, that won't affect the troglodytes, regardless of who wins the next election. They'll all be blaming the country's woes on Hillary and Barack.