.. Earl Grey should do nicely enough, I suppose ..

This unbelievable and utterly scandalous attempt by a foreign country to interfere in the domestic affairs of a sovereign state must be resisted at all costs, to prevent the worst-case scenario: the setting of a precedent. Unless you all remain strong and resolute, your tiny fledging country could soon be invaded by squadrons of refurbished Spitfires and Hurricanes piloted by hordes of buck-toothed Biggleses intent on bombing all the Wal-Marts and replacing them with millions of ye little olde curiosity shoppes, stocking innumerable second-hand copies of Shakespeare and Dickens, along with tacky-cute teapots.

You've been warned .. resistance is useless!! Long live the King!!!