How about just good ol' Planetoids?
It means "little planets", is less awkward than dwarf planets, and goes in
line with the less accurate asteroid (little star).
I also think black holes should be called collapsars, keeping in line with
pulsars and quasars.
What I really hope will come out of all this is to have astronomers using
this opportunity to educate the public and media on our favorite science
while at least one aspect of the field is hot, trendy, and generating publicity.