With the high and rising price of fuel the airline industry faces some serious challenges and needs to explore innovative techniques to increase business profitability and attract new business. My suggestion would be to dump the male flight attendants. I didn't want them in the first place.

Secondly we should replace the current female flight attendants with good-looking strippers! What the hell - the attendants have gotten old and haggard-looking. They don't even serve food anymore, just pretzels, so what's the loss?

The strippers would at least triple the alcohol sales and get a "party atmosphere" going in the cabin. And, of course, every businessman in this country would start flying again, hoping to see naked women.

Because of the tips, female flight attendants wouldn't need a salary, thus saving even more money. I suspect tips would be so good that we could charge the women for working and have them kick back 20% of the tips, including lap dances and "special services."

This would consitute a boon to airport security as Muslims would be afraid to get on the planes for fear of seeing naked women. Hijackings would come to a screeching halt, and the airline industry would see record revenues. This is definitely a win-win situation if we handle it right - a golden opportunity to turn a liability into an asset.

Why didn't Bush think of this? Why do I still have to do everything myself? How come Hilary didn't think of this?

Proposal respectfully submitted, William Jefferson Clinton