I tried it once, but was only able to come up with about a thousand monkeys. Figured I could correct for that in the math.

They got bored very quickly and wandered around, became fascinated by one particular key and pounded it endlessly, and peed on the typewriters. Replacing the old typewriters with electrics fixed that problem. They developed a tendency to go over to another monkey's typewriter and make fun of their work and criticize minor grammar errors.

There were poop fights, but this is also common in newspaper offices.

In other words, the variables mounted rapidly.

After a year, the only thing that came out the other end was "bugger you, Hamlt, you grate pouf." This was close--the "e" was missing in Hamlet, but the tone was correct. Unfortunately, this particular line had been crossed off of Shakespeare's original draft after a bad day at the writing desk, and is not considered an official part of the "Works of Shakespeare."

Sold the typewriters after a good bleach soaking, and farmed out the monkeys to a monkeyfishing preserve.