As seen here. There are several variations on the web.

Murphy's Combat Laws:



1. You are not Superman.

2. If it's stupid but works, it isn't stupid.

3. Don't look conspicuous-it draws fire.

4. When in doubt, empty your magazine.

5. Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than you are.

[Personal note: Never be the smallest man in a foxhole either, lest you be "volunteered" to jump on the enemy grenade.]

6. Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.

7. If your attack is going really well, it's an ambush.

8. No plan survives the first contact intact.

9. All 5 second grenade fuses burn down in 3 seconds.

10. Try to look unimportant because the bad guys might be low on ammo.

11. If you are forward in your position, the artillery will fall short.

12. The enemy diversion you are ignoring is the main attack.

13. The important things are always simple.

14. The simple things are always hard.

15. The easy way is always mined.

16. If you are short of everything except enemy, you are in combat.

17. When you have secured an area, don't forget to tell the enemy.

18. Incoming fire has right of way.

19. Friendly fire isn't.

20. If the enemy is in range - SO ARE YOU!

21. No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection.

22. Things that must be together to work, usually can't be shipped together.

23. Radio's will fail as soon as you need fire support desperately.

24. Anything you do can get you shot-including doing nothing.

25. Tracers work both ways.

26. The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.

27. Make it tough for the enemy to get in and you can't get out.

28. If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will have more than your fair share of objectives to take.

29. When both sides are convinced that they are about to lose, they are both right.

30. Professional soldiers are predictable, but the world is full of amateurs.

31. Murphy was a grunt.

Some other Murphy Combat Laws that I found on the Web:

The enemy invariably attacks on two occasions:
a. when you're ready for them.
b. when you're not ready for them.

Never draw fire, it irritates everyone around you.

Teamwork is essential, it gives them someone else to shoot at.

If you can't remember, then the claymore is pointed at you.

A "sucking chest wound" is nature's way of telling you to slow down.

Military intelligence is a contradiction of terms. [But not as big a contradiction as "civil war" or "liberal thinktank"]

The buddy system is essential to your survival. It gives the enemy somebody else to shoot at.

No inspection ready unit ever passed combat.

Fortify your front and you'll get your rear shot up.

If it flies, it dies.
[Aircraft recognition is an undervalued talent. If it's coming at you, it's hostile.]

Cavalry doesn't always come to the rescue.

Peace is our profession -- mass murder's just a hobby.

Killing for peace is like whoring for virginity.

There's always a way.

It's not the one with your name on it -- it's the round addressed "to whom it may concern" ya gotta think about.

If you can keep your head while those around you are losing theirs, you may have misjudged the situation.

Whenever you lose contact with the enemy, look behind you.

The most dangerous thing in the combat zone is an officer with a map.

The quartermaster has only two sizes, too large and too small.

If you really need an officer in a hurry, take a nap.

There is nothing more satisfying than having someone take a shot at you, and miss.

If your sergeant can see you, so can the enemy.

You'll only remember your hand grenades when the sound is too close to use them.

Beer math is: 2 beers times 37 soldiers makes 49 cases.

Body count math is: 2 guerillas plus 1 cow plus 2 pigs makes 37 enemy K.I.A.