...and I was ready to go home a few times, especially when the schools were dismissed at noon. The streets were empty, I hear, and we may have had as many as 2 dozen patrons come into the library all day.

A couple of my colleagues are ladies old enough to have vivid memories of Pearl Harbor. Terrible! they said. Horrible! But they saw no point in closing, and as the final decision was mine to take, we stayed open. Because if we all go home and things just stop, the terrorists win.

I still was good for nothing, though, shaky and forgetful, so I went into the office to complete the mechanical task of entering adjusted prices of purchased books on the spread sheet.

We will mourn, but we will go on.

Also, I'm having a real problem with hate right now. I need to remember that not all Palestinians are like the assholes rejoicing in the streets, and that the little kids with them probably just thought it was a party. I need to remember that only the criminals are the ones who need to be confronted and punished, along with their accomplices, but that villainy is not genetic and that I must fight the urge to hate whole peoples. Because if the terrorists can make me hate like that, I've descended to their level, and again, they win.

We lose if we sacrifice our freedom for safety. We lose if we descend from righteous anger to mindless hate. We lose if we fail to seek justice. But we can do this well. Our national character will see us through this.

I'll be giving blood in the morning. It's the only thing I can do, besides not giving up and not giving in.

Mary Anne