"What do you read to end up like you? ;) " Delighted to answer. First, you have iodine in you diet.
Glad you asked.
Try to find facts. Ask "why". Apply the morality you were raised with, realizing that all people are like all other people.
Along the way you will have thrown away childish illusions there is a black-and-white world.
And then think for yourself.
Arf