RECENT WAVE OF SUICIDE POSTINGS LEAVES THE SMALL COMMUNITY OF FLAMEBOARD, HZ, SHAKEN AND CONFUSED.
UPI-(HabitableZone) After months of uneasy peace between two of the most radical fundamentalist factions of the HZ, the Flameboard district was wracked by a violent verbal barrage of exchanges between the Vancilite and Cowinginian sects. Several HZ denizens were caught in the crossfire.
The Vancilites and Cowinginians are splinter sects of the dominant HZ organization of the First Church of the SpaceEnthusiasts. The source of the violent animosity between the two splinter sects is largely unknown, however its ramifications have been hard to miss.
The latest flare up appears to have begun on Feb. 23rd when a Cowinginian fanatic launched an unprovoked shoulder fired grammatical correction at a Vancilite post. Vancilites soon responded in kind, accusing the Cowinginians of digital corpulence.
What is the meaning of "thsi"? A "word" you use sometimes with many others. All seemingly your fat fingers and their own little dyslexic misuse of the keyboard.
This attack was compounded by the addition of a crudely constructed 'retard bomb';
You are an ethical retard!
After a 90 minute exchange of grammatical corrections the combatants withdrew to the lawless community of Flameboard. The already beleagered Flamebaord residents were stunned by the violence and grammatical corrections that followed.
"I was barely missed by a high velocity 'jackass'!" said obviously traumatized resident Buck Galaxy.
The carnage only escalated as both sides engaged in a campaign of suicide postings. Nearly hourly clusters of postings by each side defamed the other side while lowering the perpetrators standing in the community to new lows. The depths that the fanatics will sink to seems to know no bounds.
"Attacking eachother with use of facts and reason is bad enough, but when the combatants sink to using childrens insults as suicide weapons, well, my god- what is next?!" wailed a dazed resident, Alcaray (IF that *IS* his real name).
So far the combat has only utilized conventional and juvenile weapons; However many security analists warn that it could escalate to the use of Weapons of Mass Defamation, escalating the conflict to a horrific level.
Dr. Thsiisilly offered the following analysis; "These two combatants dont seem to realize that the whole world can witness these violent, and embarrassing, exchanges... I am afraid that when their associates see these exchanges and pressure them to scale down the attacks that they will react by instead escalating the violence."
As of time of press, Grammatical and spelling criticism expert MaryAnn was being called in to help negotiate a ceasefire.