and then there was......
The young scotsman that got rip roaring drunk and on the way home passed out in the woods. A lass came by and noticed he was dead to the world. Curiousity overcame her and she lifted up his kilt to peek at his equipment. The urge overcame her and she removed her blue ribbon from her hair and tied a bow around his slumbering member.
When the scotsman awoke, he felt the call of nature. Still groggy he got up and stood behind a tree where he noticed the very pretty blue ribbon. He said, "hoot mon, I donna know where we been, but I see we won first prize.
Publius