The strange thing is that we suffer the angst of secretly feeling some ill defined blame. We tend to beat ourselves up over " that we were not close enough to the person we have lost; we are still here living life while they are gone; they were needlessly sacrificed in a bogus cause; I could have visited them while they were still alive instead of going to Europe; and any of a list of a thousand recriminations that are part of the human condition. Try not to do any of this.

Instead, try to embrace the person as you best remember him. Let his good live on. Carve his name in a tree, put his initials in fresh concrete poured in front of someplace you pass. Be sure to remind yourself to remember him. Remember him and keep him young and full of the hope and spirit of youth. Somehow it helps. It also helps to share the pain of loss.

Publlius