CONSERVATIVES. The chicken did not cross the road. That chicken was on "our" side of the road in a high-level meeting with turkeys and vultures planning the next attack on the foxes bringing peace and prosperity to their land. The Predator took out 64 avian insurgents.

The liberal media reported the chicken had crossed based upon information from 200 village elders, 38 surviving carrion-eaters and avian city officials hoping for compensation for those radical avianists. These people routinely claim the loss of innocent civilians.

Upon learning of the attack and casualties, Major General Bill "Snicker" Fields said the US took every precaution to avoid killing innocent chickens and promised an investigation. "Snicker" said the investigation included review of combat reports, video and interviews with troops and civilians. He added the results were being printed and would be available in about 10 minutes. Either that or in about three years.

Arf