Do you know how many mosquitoes there are in 5 Acres of Florida?
Or how much grass that is to cut?
Maybe a herd of smiling herbivores will do it for you, but then you need to keep up the fences, and ride shotgun over them.
There's no peace for the wicked...
I'll settle for a spread that I can walk round without getting out of breath, and enough green that I could keep it trimmed if I wanted to. As it happens, we're looking for a new house right now, so I'll let people know what we settle on.