It used to be -- back in the 1950s and '60s, when you were being moved around -- that communities had a sense of cohesion. You had your mainstreamers and your dissenters. You had your eccentrics (the people who were colorful, but who were basically mainstream) and your kooks (the eccentrics who were also dissenters). But basically, you had an understanding that you were all in this together, that your community belonged to everyone, and that sometimes you had to make a move to make someone else happy even if you didn't like it to preserve that sense of belonging.

Now we have a sense that a community is a place where we own real estate, and that whatever happens there is no big deal as long as the real estate prices remain stable.

Look at how your kids relate to the place you live, and look at how frequent movers relate.

We can afford to tie ourselves more closely to concepts than to people because the people are now transitory, but the concepts stay in our heads with us as we move. Tie yourself to people and you get to see the kind of effects that ideology-based communities have on day-to-day realities.

BTW, did your mom have a career besides the one taking care of the family, or did she just have a series of jobs that meant nothing more than money? Or did she sacrifice her own career identity to make the moves possible? Or did she confine her talents to the Mom/Homemaker career? It makes a difference when talking about family mobility.