Central Park Zoo has a pair of mated male penguins who adopted an egg, hatched it and raised the little female chick. Her name is Tango, and her dads' names are Roy and Silo.

Recently, a children's book called And Tango Makes Three, by Justin Richardson and Peter Parnell, received rave reviews for its depiction of this documented case of homosexual bonding in the animal kingdom.

Obviously, Roy and Silo have willfully disregarded the will of God and have chosen sin over proper moral behavior. Where are the intervention teams? Where are the chick welfare agents? How can little Tango ever hope to grow up to be a normal penguin being raised by two degenerates?

Boston can count itself lucky that its swans have been unsuccessful in raising a family, for it will not be plagued with such problems. Unless, of course, someone decides to artificially inseminate Juliet. Or Romea. Is David Crosby still available?