re: Right. What were the first two again?
It's highly informal, and certainly incomplete, but so far:
I. In any conflict, military or otherwise, between the United States and its values and any other entity on Earth, the Left will take the other side.
II. There shall be no gods before the Almighty State. Traditional religion and traditional family in particular.
III. No Leftist ever legitimately lost an election.
IV. There is no problem in society that can’t be solved by higher taxes and more spending on the issue, i.e. killing and eating enough rich people.