Pure Genius (this is a bit dated but...)
A contest was held for people to submit their theories on ANY subject.
Below are the winners:

2nd RUNNER-UP (Subject: Probability Theory)
If an infinite number of rednecks riding in an infinite number of pickup
trucks fire an infinite number of shotgun rounds at an infinite number of
highway signs. They will eventually produce all the world's great literary works in
Braille.

1st RUNNER-UP (Subject: Symbolic Logic)
Communist China is technologically underdeveloped because they have no
alphabet and therefore cannot use acronyms to communicate technical ideas
at a faster rate.

GRAND PRIZE WINNER (Subject: Perpetual Motion)
When a cat is dropped, it always lands on its feet, and when toast is
dropped, it always lands buttered side down. It was proposed to strap
giant slabs of buttered toast to the back of a hundred tethered cats; the two
opposing forces will cause the cats to hover, spinning inches above the
ground.
Using the giant buttered toast/cat array, a high-speed monorail could
easily link New York with Chicago.