Here's a conspiracy for you
Conelrad (Emergency Broadcast System) has been around since the 50s.
With all our technological progress, space travel, computers, video cell phones, etc, the god-damned annoying periodic test/announcement/alarm (WANK,WANK,WANK) has not changed in over 50 years.
I find it difficult to believe it is still necessary, and I believe the confounded tests occur more often than they are supposed to occur.
You got your contrails, you got your crop circles, now you got your infernal EBS alarms going off 2-3 times a week. Think mind control my friends.
Where is Lindy when we need her?