Sorry, but...
The Federal government doesn't pay for my fire and police protection. Or my water, or my sewers, or my garbage collection, or my public library, or most of my schools, or anything else I pay bills and property taxes to my local companies and municipalities for.
Please tell me you were pulling my leg, and already knew that.
P.S. Many of the good things in my city and county are thanks to some filthy, filthy rich tech companies paying enormous local taxes.