Yes, I understand, Larry. Sister Mary Ronald taught us about intention and sin in catechism class. ;) Truly.

The civilian in the field hospital (Pakistan: radio interview) whose five-year-old was killed in a bombardment accident doesn't care about that. His five-year-old is dead. That's all he cares about. "We didn't mean it" is a defensive, self-justifying answer to him. "We are very sorry for your loss and regret that your son was killed accidentally while we were trying to stop our enemies from killing our children" might be better.

I just hate it when someone hurts me by accident and then rushes to say it isn't his fault when "How are you? I'm sorry you're hurt" would work so much better to help me recover. A dentist told me he didn't hurt me once when the procedure was quite painful. His self-justifying attitude made me so mad that I bit him and told him tartly, when he yelled, that it didn't hurt. (I was seven.)

The injured will never accept good intentions gone awry without acknowledgement of their suffering first. Sympathy is not weakness. Responsibility need not equal guilt.

That's all I was getting at.

Regards--
Mary Anne