EDIT...Compassion is relative to the observer. My compassion kicked in at an early age. I saw it kick in with my granddaughter when I cut my arm. It was her eyes that I focused on. True compassion.

For myself, compassion is different than what I perceive as enabling. Enabling prevents me from feeling the pain of others. It solves one thing. It clears my conscience.
Compassion for me is to help others help themselves. Not fix. Help. My mantra to help me achieve this and stay true to myself, is to teach others to become empowered with their own abilities that go untapped. Human potential.
I am raising my seven year old granddaughter 75% of the time. I see her grow into independence. It has been hard for me because I am a world class enabler. The lessons my granddaughter learns, I learn from also. It has taught me that I owe it to her to let her fail. The lesson I have also learned is that I need her to learn failure.
Not an easy task. However, the reward is great. For her...and for me when I see her *get it* and grow stronger and more self assured.

Compassion for me, is letting others fail and figure it out for themselves. I owe it to them. I also have failed. Failure is a relative term. How else would I ever know what I want or determine what I need, if I never failed. Problem solving. Life is a problem solving constant.

Compassion is all the above for me, and to love, to tolerate,and to understand in spite of it all.