I sort of agree with you Tech, but not quite. I can see what you mean about being called by your first name, as opposed to "sir" or "Mr. Podrock", as somewhat demeaning, especially if one was raised with strict manners. Most of my neices and nephews call me Sir, and frankly, it gets on my nerves. Yet I still, especially when down South, use sir and ma'am, for it shows a level of respect.

However, at the hospital, they cannot legally shout out your last name, due to medical privacy laws. They are very strict about that, and so am I. I tend to call the doctor by their title if I don't know them well, by their first name if I do. At the dentist they use my first name, and I theirs, 'cause I've been going there for 20 years. But I'm a scientist, and the son of a surgeon, and every healthcare provider learns right off that they advise, I decide.

I too notice people's names on their name-tags, and use them. If the waiter or waitress doesn't tell me their name, I might ask, or, at the end of the meal, get it off the check and thank them using their name. I like to talk to the people who are serving me, or renting me a car, or selling me a shirt. I've met some really hard working and nice people this way and learned a little about their lives. It expands my experience and gives each transaction a bit of personality. That's what I love about Farmer's markets, you can talk to the people who actually grew the corn, raised the beef, milked the cow, corked the wine, kneeded the bread...

And yet, all the time I thought I was seeing them as fellow humans I was actually establishing some sort of pecking order?

Have to think about that....

Okay, thought about it. I'm going with the "fellow human" model. Besides, you'd be surprised how many times I've been up-graded by just talking to people, using their name, looking them in the eye, sharing a joke, a smile, a kind word, seeing them as me if I had their job.