Male communication.

Guys talk differently than women. Most guys would rather not talk on the phone, at least to another guy. “Honey I’m talking to your brother, do you want to say Hi?” No!!! I’m meeting him Saturday at the Cycle Barn.” “Oh….OK.”

Most guys would rather not talk about feelings. That’s why we invented sports. “Hey did you watch the Mariners last night?” “Yeah what a game!” “ You know I’m really gonna miss the Bone.” (Oh crap, that was a feeling, must follow up with) “How ‘bout hem Bears -last season!”

That line, ”How bout them Bears” comes from “Planes Trains and Automobiles.” Steve Martin is forced to share a motel bed with John Candy. Upon awakening, Martin finds himself spooned by Candy and asks where his hands are. “Between two fluffy pillows…” Candy replies with his eyes closed and a smile of contentment on his face. They immediately jump out of bed and commence to doing the “I’m uncomfortable” dance- running in place follow buy the shifting of weight from foot to foot accompanied by straight arm banging of fists at shoulder height. “How bout them Bears”, says Candy….

A great deal of male communication is either anecdotal or technical. We tell stories. Preferably around a campfire. They usually begin with “Do you remember the time we…”or “How bout that time we…” “What was her name….? We can talk about science and technology and with no problem as evidenced here. But almost never are we allowed to say “ I Love You Man!” unless we drank our last beer and our buddy has two left.

Politics are another handy male communication tool. They allow us to express the most permissible of all male emotions- ANGER. We even take classes how to better manage this emotion.

Even though my emotions run close to the surface, I rarely get a chance to share them with other males. Occasionally they may overflow their banks on these boards. Sometimes the floodgates get stuck. I can only say please “Bear” with me.

Cheers’
Rob