re: the Earth sucks, So It Is Written On The Bathroom Wall.
From the site:
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/39512
"Burdett added: "Gravity—which is taught to our children as a law—is founded on great gaps in understanding. The laws predict the mutual force between all bodies of mass, but they cannot explain that force. Isaac Newton himself said, 'I suspect that my theories may all depend upon a force for which philosophers have searched all of nature in vain.' Of course, he is alluding to a higher power."
The "force for which philosophers have searched all of nature in vain" may indeed be suction of a special kind.
Take the CONSTANT in Bernoulli's equations and replace it with the CONSTANT used by Einstein and others in the calculation of fundamental forces. Then use fundamental quantities in the formula and see what you get.
In non-mathematical language, both space and mass have an intrinsic velocity (or pressure) that is represented by the constant (speed of light).
Since the pressure of space is C and the mass pressure is C+ the speed of electrons, atoms, and molecules, then, according to Bernoulli, the pressure must be lower within mass than outside of it.
Lower pressure within an area can be considered as suction.
Perhaps the Wall Writer was smarter than anyone can imagine. :-)
Johannes