Flame — HabitableZone

Flame » in reply to Differences between men and women

or, "When does a generalization become a stereotype?"
Fox — (archived)

It is extremely difficult to avoid the Mars/Venus dichotomy, but I do the best I can.

I have known dominant men and women, and also men and women who have, willingly or not, submerged their personalities in the face of such dominance. I have seen marriages (and other, less formal couplings) completely ruled by one of the pair... in fact, my last was one of those, until I woke up to what had happened to me, and left.

I have also seen nearly-perfect partnerships. As it happens, one of my favorite couples in that regard was a pair of gay men who had been together for 20 years without benefit of formal declaration.

As to the issue of 'strength' with other meanings -- I take people as they present themselves, regardless of their chromosomes. Enough examples of physical and emotional strength and endurance can be found in both genders to blur any realistic attempt at "either/or" characterization.

Since I've read nearly all the rest of this read before posting, I'll offer a couple of other comments here, rather than multiple replies.

First, I agree with Jody that a fully-realized partnership cannot omit the "mojo" (and of course I ascribe that quality to both genders). In an intellectual ideal, perhaps, the desire to express love physically might be successfully suppressed without harm to the remainder of the emotional dialog... but I find it hard to consider something like that in the real world without the word "regret" being applicable to both members of the couple.

On the other hand, I would argue strongly against the "need for sex" as exclusively male. That is absolutely a stereotype, albeit (probably) invented by some males on a power trip who couldn't stand the competition. In other words, not mojo, but macho.

Second, re: procreation. My vasectomy is now 22 years old. I encourage every male with a concern about overpopulation, and/or with a fear of entrapment-by-fatherhood, to have the procedure at his earliest opportunity. As an old deodorant soap commercial used to say, "It takes the worry out of being close."

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