To fill in for Tom, the Kamaaina, during his trip to the land of tanned Wahinis I'll take up the role of rhetorical rhapsodist.

Believing a torturing dictator doesn't possess illegal or banned weapons is like believing celebrities homes don't have firearms and security systems concealed within.

No self respecting tyrant ever obeys conventions & treaties - or feels the need to do so. When you can command 100% of the vote - "Yes! for Saddam!" - why would one ever feel the need to be beholden to the people or the international community?

Your Saddam was innocent routine reminds me of the old song lyrics from West Side Story (modified by moi for the occasion):

SADDAM:

Dear kindly UN members,
You gotta understand,
It's just my bringin' up-ke
That gets me out of hand.
My MOA battles failed,
My Iran war was a bomb.
Golly Moses, natcherly I'm Saddam!

Gee, President Bush, I'm very upset;
I never had the love that ev'ry child oughta get.
I ain't no delinquent,
I'm misunderstood.
Deep down inside me there is good!

SADDAM & HIS SONS
There is good!

There is good, there is good,
There is untapped good!
Like inside, the worst of us is good!

CHIRAC: (Spoken) That's a touchin' good story.

SADDAM: (Spoken) Lemme tell it to the world!

SCHROEDER: Just tell it to the UN.

SADDAM:

Dear kindly UN Council,
My parents were so tough.
With all their hasheesh,
They wouldn't give me a puff.
They didn't wanna have me,
But somehow I was had.
Leapin' lizards! That's why I'm so bad!

UN SECURITYCOUNCIL: Right!

President Bush, you're really a square;
Iraq doesn't need sanctions, it needs the UN council's care!
It's just Iraq's WMD that oughta be curbed.
Saddam is psychologic'ly disturbed!

SADDAM:
I'm disturbed!

SADDAM & SONS
We're disturbed, we're disturbed,
We're the most disturbed,
Like we're psychologic'ly disturbed.

UN COUNCIL: In the opinion on this council, Saddam is depraved on account he ain't had a normal home.

SADDAM: (Spoken) Hey, I'm depraved on account I'm deprived.

UN COUNCIL: So send him some inspectors.

SADDAM (Sings)
My father was a bastard,
My ma's an S.O.B.
My grandpa was always plastered,
My grandma pushed tea.
My sister wears a mustache,
My brother wears a dress.
Goodness gracious, that's why I'm a mess!

INSPECTORS: Yes!

President Bush, you're really a slob.
Saddam doesn't have weapons, just a good honest job.
The UN Council was simply in a terrible snit,
So we'll tell Saddam where we visit!!

SADDAM
Tell me where you visit!

Where you visit, where you visit,
Where you visit, visit, visit,
You'll tell me where you visit!

HANS BLIX: In my opinion, Saddam doesn't seem to have any weapons at all. Saddam's delinquency is purely a social disease!

SADDAM: Hey, I got a social disease!

HANS BLIX: So take him to a socialist worker!

SADDAM
Dear kindly socialist workers,
The UN wants my bucks.
Oil programs enrich you shirkers,
While I play you all for schmucks.
It's not I'm anti-social,
I'm only anti-work.
Gloryosky! That's why I'm a jerk!

SOCIALIST WORKERS:

President Bush, you've done it again!
You've proven to the world
That you're FAR worse than Stalin!
Saddam is an angel,
Just leave him alone
Call off the war,
And just go home!

SADDAM & SONS

Just go home!

Just go Home! Just go home!
Just go back home!
Just go back to your home!

You see President Bush, we got troubles of our own!

DOWD: The grinders for dissidents are getting mighty dull,
H. THOMAS: You're having trouble with the big atom bomb,
RATHER: Someone has eluded you living in a wall,
PENN: Your mass graves were stinkin up like a tomb!

President Bush,
We're down on our knees,
'Praying to Allah & Belgium to take up our pleas.
President Bush,
What are we to do?
Hey President Bush,
---k you!

___________________________________________

Yep you and Don and the rest of the leftists for whom a Bush foreign policy victory is like passing a four pound brick-o-s--t*, will always be wishing secretly for Bush's failure even if it means de facto support for a murdering, psychopathic tyrant.

That's FAR sadder than even the worst of the accusations laid against bush - namely of hyping a war to remove a mass murdering tyrant.

;-)

SDAI-Tech1

*To make up for Tom's colorful metaphors I've tried to include some cutesy colloquialisms.