The Tortoise and the Hare
There's a sequel to the story, I'd think, because a competition like ours is never truly over. In the second part of our story, "The Hare Strikes Back", the hare's humiliation compels him to stay focused and win vindication over his amphibian nemesis. But the pendulum swings, and in "Return of the Tortoise"...well, you can see where that's going.
If we can keep it within civilized bounds, this competition could be a healthy thing for all of us.
Given that the American Right never misses a chance to display its enmity toward Europe, I shouldn't miss the chance to point out that not all Americans hate Europe. Some of us think you're doing a swell job with this civilization thing--keep it up.