The reproductive drive governs everything
Humans think they are above the animals when it comes to this, but
watch just about any TV program or film, or just go to a bar or school
and that lie will be exposed.
It's all about meeting Mr. or Ms. Right, based on very ancient and
primitive criteria. That's why jerks get lucky all the time, despite the
claims by women that they are looking for a "nice" guy.
Maybe there are beings and things out there that have truly risen above
the basic urge, but here on this planet DNA rules all life, including the
ones that think they are intelligent and civilized.