You want the line out of your wallet.

I want it out of my personal life.

Currently we have not just an administration but a government in Washington that wants neither. What good, I ask you, is Your Money Given Back To You if you only have to fork out more of it because of higher interest rates born of extraordinary deficits? Would you rather be taxed through the front door or the back door?

You want to cut back on government programs to decrease the deficit? OK. You know which ones will be cut, don't you? You say that people have the same political power regardless of their income. That isn't true. One citizen, one vote is true. But people with money have the option of buying influence, which is something the poor only get if they riot.

Besides, and this is only a hunch, if all the poor were thrown out onto their own devices tomorrow, I don't think it would make much of a dent in the deficit. Adding up the actual figures for 2004 expenditures to date for Medicaid, Children's Health Insurance, Temp Assistance for Needy Families, Other Admin for Children & Families, Public & Indian Housing, FHA [not all poor folks], and Other Housing Programs, we find a total of $263,409,000. Throw in the whole Food & Nutrition Service and the total rises to $308,402,000. Medicare by itself is $301,505,000 in actual gross outlays this year so far. Other government programs have more of a share than the poor do. It's just easier to despise the poor as lacking initiative, and they haven't the ear of anyone in power.

You criticize me for talking in anecdotes. Fair enough: you're a scientist. Scientists don't like anecdotes because they can't be quantified. I'm not a scientist. I work with people. My life is one long string of anecdotes. This is my data, and it's just as real as yours. Basically, you are looking at numbers. I look those numbers in the eye and help them deal with life. You can say that's not a valid way to judge. I can, do, and will disagree with my whole heart.

There was one other political joke from Prairie Home Companion's Joke Show last weekend that I didn't tell because it was long, but I think it fits here:

"George W. Bush died and met St. Peter. St. Peter said, 'George, you have a choice of whether to go to Heaven or to Hell.' Mr. Bush asked, 'Can I see my choices first?' St. Peter replied, 'Fair enough!' So Mr. Bush went to Hell, and he found a beautiful 18-hole golf course, with a country club and a spa. People were laughing and having a good time, and Satan himself ('You can call me Nick') had him over to the bar for a couple of drinks. When he went to Heaven, it was beautiful and peaceful, but filled with very serious people discussing ethics and organized choirs singing hymns of praise to God. So Mr. Bush said to St. Peter, 'You know, I never thought I'd say this, but I think I'd like to go to Hell.' So St. Peter took him down to Hell and turned him over to Satan, who welcomed Mr. Bush and locked the doors behind him. Mr. Bush turned and saw multitudes of people chained to red hot rocks, screaming in agony. Alarmed, he turned to Satan and said, "Nick! What happened to the golf course and the country club?' Satan shrugged: 'Oh, that was just the campaign. Now that you've voted for us...'"

You might get tax relief from your guy, but you won't get fiscal relief because he won't do what it takes, and if he tries, his Congress won't help him because, unlike him, they can run for office again. Me, I already know what I'm getting.

You want to reduce the deficit? Tell you what: we can cut all the programs for the poor if we can cut an approximately equal amount for the not-so-poor. Let's try throwing all the elderly off of Medicare. We can start next year. The announcement can come just in time for Christmas. Then I'll get to see your numbers, and you'll get to see my faces, on the news, in the papers, and marching in the streets, every day.